(186) Salvation of the world depends on me.
I am not a body; I am the Son of God. I am spirit, endowed with the gifts of God. I am not what I appear to be, nor what I have thought I was for most of my life. I am a spiritual being having a human experience, and my mission here (if I will accept it) is to give the gifts of God wherever He asks me to give them. And that is to everyone.
The Course requires a radical revision of my self-concept. I have thought of myself as some sort of poor, lost soul, wandering, alone, afraid. I have thought of myself as needy and lacking. I have felt like an orphan; as though, no matter how hard I tried, no matter how many places I visited, I never quite fit in. I have seen myself at the bottom trying to get up.
Now, this book comes along, a message from God to me, and tells me that the salvation of the world depends on me. I am a key figure in the plan of the ages. Everything depends on me, and that seems frightening. And yet, I have the gifts to give the world that will save it. I can give it my love. I can give it my trust. I can give it my kindness and my mercy. I can give those around me my understanding and my faith in them. Through my forgiveness I can release them from guilt.
This is such a startling idea of what I am that at first it seems ludicrous. I think at first that to see myself this way would be the height of arrogance. And yet…and yet, if this is how God created me, if this is what He created me for, it is arrogant to refuse the task being given to me. He is not asking me to set myself above anyone else. On the contrary, He is asking me to demonstrate to everyone that they have the gifts of God as well, that they are all like me.
God is asking me, "Are you ready yet to help Me save the world?" (C-2.9:1) All Heaven waits breathlessly to hear my decision. Will I say, "Yes"? Will I dare to say, with understanding, meaning every word: "Salvation of the world depends on me"?